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Best of TTB: Not So Secret Santa

On: December 23, 2019December 22, 2019 By: The Two Bobs

Podcast: Play in new window | Download (Duration: 1:31:43 — 42.2MB)

The “Best Of” TTB for Monday, December 23, 2019:

What are The Bobs drinking?
- Rob sucked down a Birch Bark Porter from Kickstand Brewing. https://www.kickstandbrewingco.com/menu/beer-on-tap/
- Robert enjoyed a Bourbon Barrel GBS from Hardywood. https://hardywood.com/beer/bourbon-barrel-gbs/
- Follow us on Untappd at @lowercaserobert and @RobFromTTB or we’ll tell your kids who really puts the presents under the Christmas tree.
It’s time for this year’s Not-So-Secret Santa!
The Bobs picked out some of the best CRAZY NEWS moments from the last year or so. Warning: It’s fucking long but fucking hilarious. Merry Christmas, Bitches!

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The Two Bobs Podcast is © The Two Bobs. For more information, see our Who are The Two Bobs? page, or check our Contact page. Words, views, and opinions are our own and do not represent those of our friends, family, or our employers, unless otherwise noted. Music for The Two Bobs was provided by JewelBeat.

TTB118: Self-Love Sicko

On: December 9, 2019December 8, 2019 By: The Two Bobs

Podcast: Play in new window | Download (Duration: 54:13 — 25.0MB)

The Two Bobs episode 118 for Monday, December 9 or 10 (calendars are hard), 2019:

What are The Bobs drinking?
- Rob sucked down a Northern Hawk Owl from Right Brain. https://www.rightbrainbrewery.com
- Robert enjoyed an Eagle Aye-P-A from Six Bears & A Goat. https://www.6bgbrewingco.com/on-tap
- Follow us on Untappd at @lowercaserobert and @RobFromTTB or we’ll crash your midget sex party.
The latest fab diet, which does nothing to help you lose weight or live a healthier lifestyle, is definitely something we can get behind. https://people.com/food/taco-cleanse-we-tried-it/
This week’s CRAZY NEWS will be like that time you got blackout drunk, ate an entire large pizza, then spent the next day blowing up a Bob Evan’s restroom.
- Breaking into someone’s house is obviously acceptable behavior but stealing pizza ingredients should be punishable by death. https://www.tcpalm.com/story/news/blogs/off-the-beat/2019/12/03/why-stranger-pink-swiping-pizza-ingredients-my-house/4295683002/
- Woman provides discount orthodontics out of her home. Don’t worry, she’s not licensed but she has teeth herself (that counts for something, right?) and she does house calls. https://www.news4jax.com/news/local/2019/12/03/botched-braces-dentists-concerned-about-womans-facebook-ad-for-at-home-orthodontics/
- An elderly couple is arrested for performing sexual acts on each other in public. http://www.thesmokinggun.com/documents/florida/elderly-encounter-281750
- A masturbating man punches his accuser after refusing to put his snake back in its cage. https://www.nydailynews.com/news/crime/ny-masturbating-man-punches-accuser-say-cops-20191129-nfiyy6d5kbbrxabeayg7uqq64u-story.html
- A Canadian asshole (also known as “A Canadian”) is arrested for throwing buckets of shit on people. https://www.buzzfeednews.com/article/laurenstrapagiel/toronto-poop-bucket-attacks
- 71 are arrested after a sex party involving midgets, emus and a “fountain of sperm” is raided, proving that some things are just too good to be true. https://worldnewsdailyreport.com/san-francisco-police-interrupts-sex-party-involving-midgets-emus-and-a-fountain-of-sperm-71-arrests/

Please share the show with your friends, and don’t forget to subscribe! Visit www.thetwobobs.com for our contact information. Thanks for listening!

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TTB117: Arm Farts

On: November 25, 2019November 24, 2019 By: The Two Bobs

Podcast: Play in new window | Download (Duration: 58:28 — 26.9MB)

The Two Bobs episode 117 for Monday, November 25, 2019:

What are The Bobs drinking?
- Rob had an Even More Little Tiny Baby Jesus from EVILTWIN. http://www.eviltwin.dk
- Robert enjoyed a Mean Old Tom from Maine Beer Co. https://www.mainebeercompany.com/mean-old-tom
- Follow us on Untappd at @lowercaserobert and @RobFromTTB or we’ll hide crack in your car and call the cops.
We talked about the worst Thanksgiving foods, according to some random web site. https://www.mandatory.com/living/1534289-ranked-worst-thanksgiving-foods
This week’s CRAZY NEWS will remind you of that one time you accidentally got a hooker with herpes but you were really wasted and horny so you just rolled with it.
- What better way to prove someone is dead than to carry the corpse around in a body bag? https://www.dailystar.co.uk/news/world-news/women-turn-up-corpse-body-20922314
- Man is pulled over for drunk driving and tells the cops he’s been smoking crack since the 80’s. https://www.sebastiandaily.com/crime/sebastian-man-says-hes-been-smoking-crack-since-the-1980s-19760/
- Florida man robbed a bank and then instructed the teller to give him less money. https://www.foxnews.com/us/florida-bank-teller-robbery-less-money
- A man is arrested for attacking his brother for not supporting him entering America’s Got Talent. Now his only talent is dropping the soap in the prison shower. https://www.wfmj.com/story/41335571/man-accused-of-attacking-brother-for-not-supporting-him-entering-americas-got-talent
- Florida man was arrested for hiding drugs in his belly button. https://nypost.com/2019/11/19/380-pound-florida-man-arrested-after-hiding-drugs-in-belly-button/
- A Tinder whore is facing a class action lawsuit after giving crabs to 139 different men. https://worldnewsdailyreport.com/woman-on-tinder-faces-class-action-lawsuit-after-she-gave-crabs-to-139-different-men/

Please share the show with your friends, and don’t forget to subscribe! Visit www.thetwobobs.com for our contact information. Thanks for listening!

Leave us a message or text us at 530-882-BOBS (530-882-2627)

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TTB116: Sex Mannequin

On: November 18, 2019November 18, 2019 By: The Two Bobs

Podcast: Play in new window | Download (Duration: 1:11:40 — 32.9MB)

The Two Bobs episode 116 for Monday, November 18, 2019:

What are The Bobs drinking?
- Rob had a Dry Honey Saison from Old Nation. https://untappd.com/b/old-nation-brewing-co-dry-honey-saison-woodshed-pilot-series/2728997
- Robert enjoyed a Double Trouble IPA from Founders. https://foundersbrewing.com/our-beer/double-trouble/
- Follow us on Untappd at @lowercaserobert and @RobFromTTB or we’ll defile your mannequins.
We switched to YouTube TV. It’s better than AT&T TV NOW, and not just because you can say the whole name without stopping for air.
The Astros cheated and still couldn’t beat the Nats.
Disney+ has officially launched. So much streamy goodness, all over your faces.
This week’s CRAZY NEWS reminds us of that time you did bath salts and tried to eat your neighbor’s cat.
- A tourist in New Zealand flooded his apartment to get rid of an underperforming sex worker. Most people just throw coke out of an open window to get bad hookers to leave. https://www.dailymail.co.uk/news/article-7620137/New-Zealand-tourist-flooded-apartment-tried-rid-sex-worker.html
- This guy’s car was being stolen so he did the only logical thing and jumped onto the hood. https://www.boston25news.com/news/video-shows-man-jump-on-hood-of-own-car-as-it-was-being-stolen-in-south-end/1005512486
- A man was arrested for breaking into a store to save the mannequins from sex trafficking. https://www.ky3.com/content/news/Eldon-Mo-man-arrested-after-breaking-into-store-to-save-mannequins-from-sex-trafficking-564676331.html
- This guy told police the wind blew a bag of cocaine into his car. Weird considering the windows were all closed. https://www.tcpalm.com/story/news/blogs/off-the-beat/2019/11/15/man-tells-police-wind-may-have-blown-bag-cocaine-car/2572962001/
- BarkBox is in hot water for sending sex toys disguised as dog toys. https://www.aol.com/article/lifestyle/2019/11/11/barkbox-big-honkin-pigs-in-a-blanket-controversy/23858448/
- A man was arrested for sexually assaulting a police horse whole sleep walking. All opposed say “naaaaaaaayyyy”. https://worldnewsdailyreport.com/new-york-man-arrested-for-sexually-assaulting-a-police-horse-while-sleepwalking/

Please share the show with your friends, and don’t forget to subscribe! Visit www.thetwobobs.com for our contact information. Thanks for listening!

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TTB115: Dorsal Slit

On: November 4, 2019May 8, 2023 By: The Two Bobs

Podcast: Play in new window | Download (Duration: 1:06:02 — 30.3MB)

The Two Bobs episode 115 for Monday, November 4, 2019:

What are The Bobs drinking?
- Rob had an Electron Brown from Old Nation. https://www.ratebeer.com/beer/old-nation-electron-brown/497138/
- Robert enjoyed an Untitled Art Chocolate Macaroon Imperial Stout from Cerebral Brewing. https://untappd.com/b/untitled-art-chocolate-macaroon-imperial-stout/3334583
- Follow us on Untappd at @lowercaserobert and @RobFromTTB or we’ll hide teeth in your Chinese food.
Halloween happened and The Bobs couldn’t be happier with their kids’ candy pillages.
The Nats won the World Series! The Tigers just barely missed the playoffs (by about 54 games).
This week’s CRAZY NEWS is more unbecoming than going commando to church, which you should totally try (send photos).
- A UK couple found a tooth in their Chinese food. Knowing how well the British take care of their teeth we’re assuming this is normal for them. https://nypost.com/2019/10/29/couple-says-they-found-tooth-in-their-chinese-takeout/
- This guy’s girlfriend lives her life as a kitty cat. He must really enjoy pussy. https://nypost.com/2019/10/30/my-girlfriend-lives-life-as-a-kitty-cat-and-im-her-master/
- A Panama man’s rotting scrotum swelled so badly it was hanging below his knees. There’s just no possible way to make that sound any less atrocious. https://www.thesun.co.uk/news/10146658/man-scrotum-swelled-below-knees-rotting/
- A man was filmed fucking a pile of leaves. He must have hugged a tree and misread its reaction. https://metro.co.uk/2019/10/31/man-filmed-trying-sex-pile-leaves-jailed-eight-weeks-11018713/
- Since we’re on the topic of banging inanimate objects, this guy was arrested for having sex with a stuffed Olaf inside a Target store. Better than a pile of leaves, we suppose. https://www.local10.com/news/florida/florida-man-arrested-for-having-sex-with-stuffed-olaf-at-target
- A Kentucky woman gave birth to a 22-pound baby inside a McDonald’s restroom and named him Big Mac. Having experienced several McDonald’s restrooms, she dould have also named him E. coli McHepatitis. https://worldnewsdailyreport.com/kentucky-woman-who-gave-birth-to-22-pound-baby-in-mcdonalds-restroom-names-newborn-big-mac/

Please share the show with your friends, and don’t forget to subscribe! Visit www.thetwobobs.com for our contact information. Thanks for listening!

Leave us a message or text us at 530-882-BOBS (530-882-2627)

Join us on all the social things:

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